Scar Tissue

Not only was my father partial to my mothers hot pink panties, but he had a love affair with his briefs. Not boxer briefs... just briefs. From the time of cognitive thinking, the only time I can recall my father in something more than his underwear, was on Sunday's. I don't know if there was this weird magnetic force that prevented him from wearing clothing at home or what, but from the second he got home from work, he would strip down into nothing but his underwear.

Living out in the country (at the time) no one ever really came to visit and he didn't care if our friends saw him. And all of our friends did see him. Mother bought him 'lounge' pants GALORE but he refused to wear any article of clothing other than his very tight and constrictive white Fruit Of The Looms.

I don't think anyone should know their father that well.

So when our friends would come over, dad would remain engrossed on whatever big-satellite-dish program he happened to be watching at the time, never bothering to cover himself up until Mother would screech:

"Jackie! Cover your self up!" She always tried to sound shocked and offended that our friends were seeing him in his underwear as if she herself had not been staring at them for the last thirty years.

He would drag a throw pillow over from the other side of the couch and place it in his lap. If he ever needed to get up and get coffee or visit the bathroom, he would just get another throw pillow and put it behind him. So basically, whenever he was mobile he was clutching a small pillow in front of him and a small pillow behind him. And as the decoration around the house changed, so did his attempts at modesty.

And he made no attempts to hide the fact that he was doing it to protect your feelings..not his. He clearly did not care if you saw him in is undergarments. He would drag his feet from room to room with a devil may care bored look on his face as he held his pillows. He did not hide the fact that our friends were imposing on his ability to be one with nature.

But more strangely, none of our friends found it the least bit odd. I think they expected no less.