Nutrition 101We get it okay? You're Fertile Myrtle. Now go eat a hamburger.
posted by Maddie at 2:42 PM
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Nutrition 101We get it okay? You're Fertile Myrtle. Now go eat a hamburger.
About Me
- Name: Maddie
- Location: Alabama
I know what you're thinking: I'm from Alabama and I have no business whatsoever pointing out the flaws of Hollywood Celebrities. But I'm very talented at running my mouth due to my years of working in Radio. I follow the daily lives of celebrities because it's a few hours a day that I am not trying to run my own advertising agency or be a mother to two little boys who demand juice every five mintues on rotating shifts. I have a wonderful bonus son who is determined to drive us all crazy and his mother (my husband's ex wife and dear friend of mine) into an early grave. My husband is a police officer and HORRIFIC pool boy. My mother's vocabulary includes words such as 'attack-ted' and 'muncho'. So who am I to tell celebrities that they should never have visible camel toe?
Terms and Definitions
Trailer Park Tammy • ( 'trA-ler park tam âe)
adj.: An individual, usually a woman, who appears as if she resides in a heavily populated trailer park.
Ex: Britney Spears
Redneck Rita • (red-ânek rit a)
adj.: An individual, usually a woman, whose actions and opinions are similar to those of the rural South.
Ex: Tara Reid
Mattress-Back Road-Whore
(ma-tres bak rOd hOr)
adj.: An individual, usually a woman, who appears to have had many multiple partners and has a weathered appearance.
Ex. Paris Hilton
Fug • (fUg)
adj.: Frightingly ugly.
Ex. Bjork
Whoreible • (hOr a ble)
adj.: Marked by or conducive to horrible. Can also be used as a noun or pronoun.
Ex. Sharon Stone
Whoretrocious • (hOrtrO-shes)
adj.: Utterly revolting
Ex. Kevin Federline
Gone • (go-n)
adj.: So far removed from reality it is unlikely to come back. Can be used as a noun or pronoun.
Ex. "That outfit is so gone."
Skank • (ske[a]k)
adj.: An individual whose actions are similar to those of a Trailer Park Tammy or Mattress Back Roadwhore.
Ex. Jessica Simpson
Puddin • (pu-din)
adj.: An individual who may not reside in a trailer park but probably should.
Ex. Lindsey Lohan
Critter • (kri-ter)
adj.: A being of anomalous or uncertain aspect or nature.
Ex. Whitney Houston
Fantabulous • (fan'tab ye-les) adj.: The combined usage of âfabulousâ and âfantasticâ.
Ex. Jessica Alba
Whore • (hOr)
adj.: Jessica Simpson
Ex. Angelina Jolie
Trailer Park Tammy • ( 'trA-ler park tam âe)
adj.: An individual, usually a woman, who appears as if she resides in a heavily populated trailer park.
Ex: Britney Spears
Redneck Rita • (red-ânek rit a)
adj.: An individual, usually a woman, whose actions and opinions are similar to those of the rural South.
Ex: Tara Reid
Mattress-Back Road-Whore
(ma-tres bak rOd hOr)
adj.: An individual, usually a woman, who appears to have had many multiple partners and has a weathered appearance.
Ex. Paris Hilton
Fug • (fUg)
adj.: Frightingly ugly.
Ex. Bjork
Whoreible • (hOr a ble)
adj.: Marked by or conducive to horrible. Can also be used as a noun or pronoun.
Ex. Sharon Stone
Whoretrocious • (hOrtrO-shes)
adj.: Utterly revolting
Ex. Kevin Federline
Gone • (go-n)
adj.: So far removed from reality it is unlikely to come back. Can be used as a noun or pronoun.
Ex. "That outfit is so gone."
Skank • (ske[a]k)
adj.: An individual whose actions are similar to those of a Trailer Park Tammy or Mattress Back Roadwhore.
Ex. Jessica Simpson
Puddin • (pu-din)
adj.: An individual who may not reside in a trailer park but probably should.
Ex. Lindsey Lohan
Critter • (kri-ter)
adj.: A being of anomalous or uncertain aspect or nature.
Ex. Whitney Houston
Fantabulous • (fan'tab ye-les) adj.: The combined usage of âfabulousâ and âfantasticâ.
Ex. Jessica Alba
Whore • (hOr)
adj.: Jessica Simpson
Ex. Angelina Jolie
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6 Comments:
Yay! First!
V.B - I can't stand that bitch. I don't actually know a single person who does.
Her husband is as thick as pigshit too.
Anyway (fave word) back to her. The stick insect seriously needs to eat. Blocks of cow fat, I suggest.
Then retire quietly in a chair in the corner and never bother us again.
Don't ya just love the way he plays around and everyone blames her "she was too involved in her own career" (laughs), "she wasn't paying him much attention". It's so good!
I thought she'd "trapped" him enough with three kids. She's clearly a stable woman.
Let's hope she does retire P&T.
Now what exactly does it mean 'thick as pigshit'?
LOL Yeah, Maddie - I'm wondering the same thing. I may actually want to borrow that phrase. After I figure out what it means, that is. . . *g*
And as for the comment about her being too involved in her own career, I have to ask. . . . what career??? And I'm sure he can play around all he wants - as long as the $$$ stays with her. True love. . . ain't it grand?
"Thick" is Britspeak for stupid. "Thick as pigshit" is a popular term there to describe someone who's not very bright.
MJ - Brit-US translator
Thanks MJ...what would I do with out you?
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